WOAH! WHAT THE EFF IS UP?

Oh, holy CRAP!
What is going on you guys?
Homie g's...Skillet...Dawg...
Yeah

You thought this blog was dead huh? I don't blame you. But the true question is...will it blend? is it really dead? NOPE! Chuck Testa!

I'm progressively more random, so the reason this is all broken up is because it's like my brain. What do vegetarian zombies say? GRAAAINS. Lolwut? What do vampire zombies say? VEINSSS. Seriously, shut up. What do movie zombies say? RUN, IT'S ABRAHAM LINCOLN!


*cough cough* I'm sick cause some kid coughed on me for an hour straight.
I'm high on life too.

SET GOALS TO TALK ABOUT, GO! 1. School so far. 2. UhhuhhuhhDISEASES! RIGHT! 3. Coconut water 4. Hamburgers 5. Books 5a. Book characters irl

1~School. I'm not sure if I like moving up grade after grade. It's becoming sort of a death sentence. But we'll see. On the other hand, I watched my Social Studies teacher try to breakdance in front of my locker bay.
Also, a lot of people seem to die. Over the past 2 months, I've heard of 4 deaths. Like, guys. Stop this. You're beautiful or handsome either way. You know about threesomes and foursomes...I get why they call you handsome! Oh my god, shut up mind. Okay! Section 2, nya!

2~Aj is convinced I have schizophrenia. I don't, guys. To prove that, I'm gonna take a test...
Later on: Uhhhhh...Um...I took a test, and on a scale of 0 to 14+, with 0 being no symptoms and 14+ being definitely yes, I got a...Umm...10? T____T BE QUIET. I'M JUST SPECIAL.

3~Coconut water. I saved this draft after finishing section 2, so I have no clue why I put that there. I think it was because on the side of it, it says 'More potassium than two bananas! Don't tell the monkeys!'
Now I'm thirsty. And sick. Meh.

4~WHY DID I CHOOSE THIS, AHH? I bet the second I post this thing, I'll remember. For now, I'm going to say that hamburgers are awesome.
Have you ever thought about who invented the hotdog? Not so much the hotdog, but the shape? Like, "I'm gonna make a new meat." "Oh boy!" "It's gonna be sort of like a ovalish type thing, like a tube almost." "Hmm. To put in sandwiches?" "Sort of. But I was thinking we should make this rectangle bread that tastes like garbage." "Oh, I see...Well, what should we make it out of?" "Meat. All sorts of options. Just meat." "Err...kay. How about a name? Thought of one yet?" "HOT DOG! THEY'LL NEVER DOUBT THE MEAT AGAIN!"
How about meatballs? We're going to take all of the leftovers from our hotdogs and hamburgers and stuff, and put it into one blob. Bam. What should we call it sir? It's just a ball of meat. THAT'S IT! MEATBALL!

5~Books I have been reading! If you want to live a normal lifestyle, go ahead and read these! First of all, so much manga. I've gotten into Fullmetal Alchemist, Ouran High School Host Club, and re-gotten into Fruits Basket.
Also, there's a book called Divergent that's absolutely LOVELY. It's sort of like taking Hunger Games and Harry Potter, combine them to have a child, make it into a test-tube baby, then inject it with something secret and special. I loved it. Also, the author lives here in Chicago! Crazy. Thank you, Kat for recommending.
Last but not least, a book I'm sure you've never heard of *hipster cough, jk*, The Fault In Our Stars! Woaaaaah. It's SO good! I can't recommend it enough. I got it on hold at the library about 3 months before it came out and have a 'Hanklerfish' in my own copy. Go read it now!

5a~Book characters irl, which might be changed to 'media characters irl' if I get off topic.
Okay. So TFIOS is an awesome book. (I won't spoil it, no worries)
The main beautiful male character is called Augustus Waters. I will not get into how mind-boggling hot this boy is, because your computer might explode at that would be 'bad.' Just imagine a really hot boy. Then he has a friend who's half-blind and has awesome blond 'emo' hair and wears thick glasses called Isaac. People might disagree, but I find him undeniably attractive too.
The point is, I went to school like normal, and I was going to homeroom. I have homeroom in this thing called the 'Home Ec' room, which is where we cook/sew/bake/do stuff.
I go in, and this boy from the period before is stretching out something that looks vaguely like bread and jello mixed together. It's all over his hands.
I put my elbows on the counter, all 'What are you making?' 'Pizza crust.' He looks up at me, and I nearly flip out, because holy mother of turds, he looks EXACTLY like Augustus Waters and Isaac put together!
This has happened before a lot to me, like how AJ's brother's friend looks like Harry Potter.


Did I finish this post in 2 days? Yes! Girl power, nya!
Whew. That took a while.
Yay.

Who Cares Baby, I Think I Wanna Marry You

Wow. I want to marry you too Bruno Mars, c'mhere honey <3

Nah. ChrisTOFU Drew is my man of the day. But that's not what I'm going to talk about today.

First of all, I'm sorry that I only update this blog once a month, but hey, less is more.

Agenda for today:

1. I got asked out
2. Tubas
3. Oddfish
4. ChrisTofu
5. Guitar
6. Europe
7. Taylor Swift

NUMBER ONE: I GOT ASKED OUT
I said no.

The story starts with me, AJ, and Kat walking out of school, normal day, ho-hum.
Then there's a group of Graders (whenever I say 'Graders,' I mean people above my own grade. So yeah).

Anyway, a group of Graders are sitting on someone's lawn, and I try not to trip as I walk over them. About 5 of them either wolf-whistle or scream 'HI JEN. <3'
I just nod and smile like a moviestar, trying to get through the male clump, and a guy screams 'WANNA SEE A MOVIE?'
I keep walking. 'WANNA SEE A MOVIE ON FRIDAY WITH ME?' They keep screaming, I turn around and I see this Grader (one that called me sexy on FaceBook, but that's another story), jumping and waving his arms.

I naturally think of good things to say now, such as: 'I rather stick shards of glass up my ass.' or maybe flipping them off behind my back with the lollipop I was eating.

Either way, I'm not sure if they'll be there tomorrow. If they are, I'll be ready.

NUMBER TWO...TUBAS
I was at my locker before Number One, above, took place, and AJ was just singing this 'BOM BOM BOM BOM' song into my ears, so that they still ring.
Either way, I was just standing there, and she goes:

I would love to be paid to follow around a fat person with a tuba.

I'm happy to admit that I went into hysterical laughter after that. Love love.

NUMBER THREE...ODDFISH

We had literacy week at my school. They got some author guy to come, and read some of his book to us. We thought it'd be lame. Well...

I took notes on it, and it was actually pretty good. I mean, apology guns, and litterboxes, and eyeballs, and beer, and underwear made of leather, and tranksters, and stuff.

What's not to love? Order Of Oddfish. Click MEH

NUMBER FOUR...CHRISTOFU

I have the Drew Flu. Nevershoutnever. They're a band, and I'm thinking of renaming my blog "YourBiggestFan" for awhile. Gimme your opinions on that, please.

Btw, he's super hot in my eyes. Just letting you know.

NUMBER FIVE...GUITAR

I'm trying to teach myself guitar on the iPad. If I already talked about this forgive me.

I gave up on it because the iPad only senses two touches at once, and you need at least three for a normal guitar. So I just play chord by chord now.

NUMBER SIX...EUROPE

Going to Europe over spring break, so you won't see much of me then, not that you normally would, har har. Thought you might want to know, you stalker >D

NUMBER SEVEN...TAYLOR SWIFT

Going to her concert on August 10, hopefully. So you can stalk me there too :P

BAI NOW, I LOVE YOU.

Another Thing (I'm Too Lazy To Edit)

We were in the library, and the librarian was droning on about Google search terms. I was insanely bored and all, and then she said something I could logic my way out of.

"If you're searching, speak caveman. Don't say 'What causes the lightning?' Say something like 'Cause lightning' Cavemen don't know the word 'what'"

HOW THE HELL DO CAVEMEN KNOW THE WORD 'LIGHTNING'? I didn't know that word 'till the 1st grade.

This is what cavemen say: Ooh, ooh, aaah, wuh, mah.

I'm pretty sure that if I searched that on Google, the Google editors would not be pleased.

That is all <3

Sorry, I Was Sick

WITH BIEBER FEVER WITH THE CYRUS VIRUS WITH DREW FLU <3

Oh yes, you read that right. Now keep reading.

Christofer Drew has now been bumped to the top 5 of my list of 'People I Will Never Marry But Insanely Want To"

He is cute (really), funny (really), he curse (like me, and really), he plays guitar (really), and he sings songs. About LOOOOVE.

Really ♥

Speaking of which, I'm trying to teach myself guitar. It's not working out. I'm not bad or anything, it's just that I don't have a guitar.

Yeah. I play ♪Musico♫ on my dad's iPad, which isn't that bad. The problem is, the iPad only senses two touches at once, so I can't hold down more than two strings.

I'm still good enough to play a song by Christofer (called Trouble, go look it up).

I saw the movie Rango. That was pretty 'cool.'

Today we had an author at our school. That wouldn't be weird except for the fact that he wrote a book on ripping off fingernails and making people eat them, building dollhouses out of body parts, and etc.

For those interested, you can go to your library/bookstore and hunt yourself down a copy of The Order of the Oddfish.

Stuff I rather not talk about in school will not be talked about today.

Alice.

I drew a goddess. Yeah. That's something, I think.

I got back to Crewing shows and missed half a day of school because of it. Now I'm friends with some awesome Grader who's way shorter than me. I called him Marty. He dresses like a carnival guy in his shows.

Really :P

Also, PRINCESS BRIDE. I bought myself a copy of that book. It is the best. Go read it now. It sounds really lame, but it's really awesome. Delicious drolleries, beautifulest ladies, sword fighting, giants, love, hate, death, war, princes, horses, logic, ET CETERA.

I think I'll stop my drolleries here :3

Poem

Don't say yes to her,
Say yes to me,
And run away as far as both our eyes could see.

To the streets of Chicago,
We'll both run away,
To the places and alleys where our children will play.

Say yes to me,
I will be yours,
And mine you will be.

That was written by me on a sudden stroke of genius after listing to Speak Now by Tay.

I was just fantasizing how it would go into my life, and I wrote the poem in my head, rushing here to Blogger to write it down before I forgot.

I took a picture a LONG, LONG time ago, last summer actually, and that also kind of inspired that.

I took that with my cellphone, zero editing, on the moment. The bride and groom were running because they were late, not because I asked them to.

And yes, the SEARS Tower is in the back. I live in Chicago. <3

And Now You People Want to Know WHAT THE HELL is Going On...

BRAVO. BRAVO. HERE IT COME.
BRAVO. BRAVO. YUM, YUM YUM.

Oh yes. Pirates of Penzance...the fourth best play I've ever seen (following AVPM, AVPS, and the Jungle Book).

I have my own script, but I won't tell you about the plotline right now.

What is awesome is that I had crew for it, of course, and at the end of the shows, all of us would run out in our paint splattered jeans and our hair in crazyness, and scream 'YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. WE CREW. YAH.'

We were the best. We had a pizza party one day, then a cake party the next, where AJ got all hyped up on Dr. Pepper, and I had to carry her around like a dogsled to keep her from attacking innocent bystanders.

A lot of people also signed my shirt. Fun.

I signed a guy's arm in red Sharpie. I believe the mark is still there.

Also.

I had my birthday. I'm ___(insert age)____ now ^^

And my birthday presents were: A bunch of spam from FaceBook. Some mittens in wolf colors from AJ. Hunger Games bracelet from AJ. A piece of caramel from Aj (<3). And this purty glog from Kat that I will link you to.

I'll finish this post tommorrow, I promise! :D

The Stories Of A Weekend's Day in Crew, and other human-made Disasters

I hate books that start with titles like that. Whatever. It's business time.

If you're just joining us me, then you won't know that I have what is called BRAVO Crew. This is the 'crew' of a theater 'workshop' at my school.

I had to go build and paint yesterday (Saturday), and I brought back a lot of stories.

First of all, I started talking about AVPM with a bunch of other people on my 'team', then we moved on to how the slogan 'Lick or Be Licked' is.

Oreo's sayings are of course followed by a string of dead baby jokes...

The snack that smiles back...BABIES.

How many babies do you need to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a dead baby? There's no Cadillac in my garage.

Writing in bold makes me feel important.

Me and some guy got on the 'headset' during rehearsals, and nearly got in trouble for it too, until some other guys tried to talk into it as well, and got yelled at.

But now comes the highlight of my day and probably my week.

In the play we're working on, called Pirates of Penzance, a statue of a man is needed. We couldn't carve a stick person out of Styrofoam, that wouldn't be right. But we weren't exactly the best at free-drawing, so that was out too.
We eventually came down to two options, and both involved an 8th grader that had a creepy interest in me.

Our first idea was to dump paper-mache all over his body and feed him with a tube until the show was over, but our teacher thought that it was too dangerous and hurtful, so that was thrown out our virtual window.

The next was brought on by a random brilliance in the 5 or so of us.

We broke into the costume room and got out some sunshine yellow sweatpants, and told the 8th grader, Alex, to put them over his skinny jeans.
We then got him a black sweater about 2 sizes too small, and told him to just wear that, since he wouldn't be able to fit it over his shirt.
A stretched out hat with one eyehole was for his whole face, to make it a smooth surface.

Once he was ready, we instructed him to lay down on the bench in the 'Scene Shop' while we fetched two rolls of duct tape. I promptly taped his feet together, no chance of escape.
We got Jei's ok, and started to duct tape half of his body.
Alex had no idea what we had planned, but we told him to relax. Jei helped us with the taping, all the while the high-school spotlight director, Charlie, made a table five feet away.
After about an hour of work and help from one of the actors, we were satisfied.
'Charlie! Come here! We need your help!'

Charlie came over, and his eyes nearly popped. 'WHEN DID YOU DO THAT?'
'We've been working on this for nearly one and a half hours while you made a table.'
'Oh.'
We told Charlie to help lift duct-taped Alex up on to his feet.
Alex couldn't even talk or stand alone, so Charlie stood behind him and held him upright while I went to go and get the director.
'Ms. R, we have a surprise for you. We can't bring it out.'
She followed me into the room, and saw exactly what I saw, a teenager covered half in duct tape dressed like a bumblebee.

'Wow! This is awesome! It should be in the yearbook!'

After a lot of pictures, we realized we'd have to get Alex out of the duct-tape.

Jei took the biggest scissors she could find, and started to cut the hat, along with some of Alex's hair, off.
I went to talk to the guy through the headset a bit more again, and when I came back to the shop, I found a half-naked 8th grader parading around, waving pink Styrofoam pieces into the air.
I stood their in shock, partly because he was heading toward me, and partly because another guy called Tyler had come in with the recycling bin, screaming 'I'VE GOT THE MATH! I'VE GOT IT!'

We stuffed Alex's cocoon with math homework, and made a pretty decent looking person.

I'm still happy.

Pigs, Hogs, Warts, Followers, and a whole lot of...SILLY Stuff

Yes.

Pigs
The best term I have for the snotty/stuck-up girls in my school who think they are better than others because they get manicures and show off their pink bra straps. I would call them bitches, but those are female dogs, which are beautiful. So that is out.

Hogs
Read above, but in male form. None really at my school.
Note: Hogs do not wear pink bra straps. Just saying.

Warts
To quote Alex Day: I'm nearly done with the goddamn Potter Sequel. It's good, it's just very very long.

It's amazing, but anyone who hasn't expirienced it before should read Harry Potter 1-4 and then start with the Very Potter Musical, also on YouTube.

I'm not getting paid to say that.

Followers
OH YES. Jared the lovely college guy has decided to follow my blog. This is exciting for me on a huge level. My very first unknown follower.
If I knew him, I'd say something like 'I love you.' But no. But thank you <3
I owe it a bit to Kat, since she told him about my blog. But still.
You're lovely, all y'alls. Thank you.
Go And Visit This, Yeah?

Silly Stuff
He's Harry Freaking Potter ;D
Pirates of the Penzance is coming along. I painted some columns and some rocks. Then I got high off chocolate fudge. After that, we painted a girl's coat.
Then I talked to some guy backstage about how he has to act gay because there are so many girls around him all the time. I apprently am either: a) a male b) a unicorn
I have no idea any more.

I have glitter on my eyes/face, since I rubbed a sparkly drawing of mine then accidently rubbed my eyes...

I might add a new font...so yeah.

Ta-ta for now o3o

Ipod!

Awww, sorry guys. You never call. You never write.

Happy new year, I think.

My phone's dead. That's why I'm depressed.

It's 2 pm and I'm sitting in my living room in my jammies. These consist of red plaid pants, a Yellowstone dress thing that's puke green and says 'I moose have a hug' and a baby blue fuzzy sweater.

I look like someone who escaped a mental unit that was kept in the back of a Macy's.

Either way.

I added an iPod gadget, after about an hour of endless suffering. I'll add descriptions of all the songs and why I added them.

Here we go.
Sparks Fly-Epic song
I'd Lie-A nice theme song for myself
Caramelldansen-My hyper song and dance song
Viva La Vida-Theme from 5th grade, by far. We sang it while my enemy recorded.
Llama Song-Llama teeth
Dam Dadi Doo-Another happy song
How To Speak English-Gurgle snerk.

I'll edit once I check the list.

I caused a huge amazement in class about a week ago, since I wrote 'Status: I'm in love' on a desk in pen. I admit it. I was bored. And a bunch of people were yelling 'WHO DID THAT'

I want to learn how to play guitar.

OH. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY I've mastered the use of the potty.
Yeah, AVPS reference.

But no. For the last two weeks, I danced. It was so great. I was a spare, which is means that I danced with a different guy every day.

I had Alex, Cameron, Kevin, Calvin, Paul, Luis, and Kenzo. That's 6 guys. Yeah.

At least, that's how many I remember.

Whatever.

I should stop babbling.

My pet orange died.

Carlos.

Dead.

Me and AJ kept this orange/clementine as a pet, and named him Carlos after the baby in the Hangover. His first day, AJ carried him to all of her classes.

His second day, I did. I was walking to my locker, when this guy who normally is nice enough, jumped at me and grabbed Carlos, making a long claw mark in him.

Carlos bled to death in my hands and AJ's locker later.

We will miss him.

CHERRY MISTMAS! ♥

Oh my god. I can't believe it's Christmas Eve. Things have gone by so fast.

But that's what everyone says.

My dad wants me to make a blog, but I don't really want to tell him that I already did, nearly a year ago, and that I talk about a bunch of things he does on it.

I have gotten a shitload of socks. Seriously.

I make it my personal goal to wear them all. I'm wearing my vanilla-scented ones right now.

I still know that a bunch of people never comment and never rate, but view my blog. What should I supply you with?

...

Screw it. I'm not supplying you with anything. Just keep reading.

I was going to mention that I just added the peanut butter and jelly sandwich to the back of the title. It has nothing to do with the blog itself, but I love it. I found it by typing 'LISTEN HOT STUFF' into Google Images.

Which brings me to another point. I can see how you find my blog. And I see that someone found my blog by typing 'Why can't we all wear loincloths' into Google.

I was actually going to write a whole post about them, but then I thought ''It would be awfully weird if you didn't tell anyone that you type Ke$ha lyrics into Google when you're bored."

Hyperbole and a Half has become one of my passions. Seriously.

So has Harry Potter. I need the second book. Like, now.

Don't spoil it for me, please. I know enough about it to ruin a good bit.

I'll update this tommorrow. My stomach hurts too much to write anymore. Oh wait. I'll write some more, nevermind.

For dinner, guess what I made? Madartej, or ouefs da la neige (or something like that). It's like vanilla cream/custard with little edible styrofoam puffs.

I named the puffs Uofies.

My dad made this fish soup (delicious). You're supposed to make it with trout, but he just dug through the freezer and dumped whatever he could find into the pot. He found salmon, shrimp, and clams.

My mom made a big, delicious German Chocolate cake with little pink hearts on as a topping.

Alright, I'll seriously update this tommorrow.

My Thouhts On Staying Up Late

NEVER DO EET.

YOU WILL END UP LIKE ME.

My friend showed me a website called Hyperbole and a Half, and after nearly coughing up a lung from laughing, I thought it was time to draw a simple picture of what I thought about the website.



So after this dramatic 'outlet of human energy'.

It's me riding on the back of a goose.

I seriously need to lay off eating sandwiches and hot chocolate after 10 pm.

I mean.

BWAHAAHHAHAHHAHA.

I can be simple sometimes, but now I'm just mentally insane.

I know how happy you must be that I posted.

I saw a Chicago Bulls game yesterday.

It was...weird.

I'm going to go take a nice long nap now...

Changes...

Yep, the blog changed, in honor of Chicago 2010's first snow on December 1st. I know it's the 4th. Deal with it.

Also, I changed the font and the colors and the background. If you can't read this, deal with it.

If the text is too small, I'll give you three options: 1. Suck it up. 2. Get a magnifying glass. or 3. Push 'Ctrl' and '+' a bunch of times to zoom in.

It'll be Saint Nicholas Day on...Monday, but my family held it today and I got pressies :3

Presents, I mean.

I got wonderous fur-lined snow boots, along with some gloves. I got chocolate flavored like eggnog, pie, and peppermint, which I'm eating right now.

After I opened a bunch more things (fine, not a bunch), and my dad opened his 8-piece knife set, I suggested that we make...Ready for it?

CHARLIEISSOCOOLLIKE ULTIMATE BURGERS. OH YES. YOU READ THAT RIGHT.

No. There's a channel on YouTube called SortedFood Right here and they featured charlieissocoollike to make inside out burgers with them.

And that's here...

So we made that for lunch. They turned out pretty good, except I got the biggest one, so I only ate...that one, leaving my parents to eat 5 burgers.

I stupidly bought 12 hamburger buns. I thought the burgers would be smaller, since there were 2 pounds of beef. Two pounds of cow.

And instead of pretty-cheap American cheese, I decided to use my dad's expensive Gouda cheese, covered in cheese wax and all.

So it was delicious.

I must say that I don't post often, and I really know that. You don't need to tell me. But I have, em, a life and places to go, so I can't post everyday. I admire you if you can. Slightly. Not.

I also noticed that in my last post I was pretty angry at something.

That post got a one star review. I'd like to know that person. Why one star?

People, if you must rate me, then at least mark a tag. Then I'll understand what was wrong with the post. If you can't leave a comment.

I mean, the one star person could have marked it because they hated me. Or because they disagree. They thought I was too whiny. Or simply because their mouse slipped. I'll never know.

And if you don't speak much English but want to leave a comment, go ahead and do so in your own languague, I have Google Translate to help me.

I've gotten a lot of viewers from Russia and Denmark lately, so if you want to leave a comment in Russian or...Denmarkish (I know that's not right), feel free?

I think that'll be all.

I Hate...

I feel like ranting. Don't take it personally.

Here gose nothing.

I hate the word 'duh'. I hate it when it's obivious, and that I'm such an idiot to see it a different way.
I hate being called an idiot.
I hate getting less views because I don't post (DUUUUH).
I hate that I get pressured into writing posts.
I hate being called ugly.
I hate these teeth.
I hate that I can't tell this to anyone in person.
I hate that I can't be mean.
I hate that there's a rule against going up to people and punching them in the face.
I hate self control.
I hate that if I get kicked in the shin, nothing happens, who cares. I hate that if I touch you, you cry.
I hate that I'm supposed to care.
I hate that you don't.
I hate that if you read this, you'll be tempted to leave a comment. 'I don't care. You just suck.'
I hate that no matter how many times you tell me, I'll forget.
I hate that I can't even control myself typing this. I just am.
I hate that I can write a thing like this and not feel guilty.
I hate people who think that the world will end because of __Insert self-absorbed word here___.
I hate that I can't fly.
I hate that I can't MAKE THEM SHUT UP.
I hate when people lie to me.
I hate when I hate things.
I hate when I feel sympathy for things that deserve none.
I hate...I hate being hopeless.
I hate when you ridicule me. You never had permission. Only he is the one I allow to call me an elephant and get away with it.
I hate those girls. The ones who think they have it all.
I hate...puberty x3
I hate it when they tell me to lose the attitude. Look who's talking.
I hate it when people yell louder when you tell them to shut up. (ex. 'Dude, shut up.' 'DON'T YOU TELL ME TO SHUT UP! WHAT DID YOU JUST TELL ME?')
I hate it when I wish it would all be over.
I hate homework.
I hate eating Expo markers.
I hate that there can only be one lucky girl.
I hate that whether or not it's me, I'll feel guilty.
I hate that I grew up.
I hate this list.

Good bye. ♥ I love you.

Only if you're someone I love, however.

Brown Duck Fucks At Haunted Houses In Midsummer

If you read the title, you'll know what this post is about. So let's go :D

Brown.
This is probably one of the worst inside jokes ever. Me and AJ were sitting in the front of a laundromat, looking like hobos. AJ was showing off her new highlighters to me.
She switched all of the caps around, so that green had a yellow cap, and orange had a green one, etc.
She was giving me somewhat of a retard test, and I was failing because I'm always SO TIRED when I walk home from school.

So she points to pink. "What's this color?" "...Brown." And I start laughing so hard that I can't stand up. I try to, but keep laughing, falling back into a squating position that looks like a retarded dog taking a crap, and say 'Brown.' again, laughing harder.
At this point, a guy in a suit walked in and thought I was taking a brown. So I stood up.

Next topic!

Duck Fucks =D As you know, this is an exciting topic.

It's a poem. A limerick poem. Enjoy.

There once was a sad little duck,
With the deep want, almost urge, to fuck.
Then our friend Ted,
Sadly just said,
'Guess I'll have to hire a shmuck.'

So then the sad little duck,
Still implanted with the urge to fuck,
His friend said,
'You know what Ted?
I think that I'm also a duck...'

'Implanted with that urge to fuck.
So don't run yourself over with a truck.'
With that said,
They skipped off to bed,
Oh yes, they were in quite good luck.

So now bouth Ted and Jerry
Went off they were merry
Butts loaded with kids
You ask how they did?
The truth, those kids were quite hairy.

I know what you're thinking, Barry.
That in truth, your aunt is quite scary.
But my dear sweetie,
You're in for a treatie,
The truth is quite the contrary.

Because my dear cousin Barry,
The kids, yes hairy,
But the truth,
Now you don't need a sleuth,
Is that I'm the mother of that same Jerry.

THE END.

Haunted houses!
AJ was a little innocent girl at a haunted house tour, which was so scary.
Not the tour, her. Haha. I'm dodging that 'kill'.
Either way, it was amazing. She had a week to memorize 3 minutes of speech and...with much me as audience she did. It was really great.

The makeup made her look like she'd been punched, but otherwise, it was great. The dress was...puffy at the lady parts (har har) so they had to fix that and put bows in her hair. That added to the innocent look.

But a little more in depth on the tour. There was a little booklet with about 3 sentences of info about the 5 houses you went to. There were I'd say about 25 people on each tour (I was tour G).

What happened was that there were people set around the city, pointing out which way to go. Then you'd meet a person at the steps of the house, who tell you as much info as they knew about the ghost living in the home.
Then, they'd step aside, and a person dressed as the ghost would come in, and say somethings about the expiriences from the ghost point of view.

It was so cool. <3

Last part of the post! I promise!

I went to Midsummer Night's Dream, as you know.

But today, I got my boots on at the end of school inside, which took quite awhile, so Kat and AJ were crowded along my locker bay.
I started to tell the story of some ID mix-up or something or another, and this guy comes up to me, taller than me, quite...large and blond, his face red and goes "I COMPLETELY AGREE WITH WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! ABSOLUTLY!"
All of us look at him and he smiles. "You know I was talking about class, right?" I say.
"Uhh...yeah. But I still agree! =D"
"Wait a second...Aren't you the guy from BRAVO? Midsummer Night's Dream?" Me and AJ say at once.
"Yeah. =D"
Since I can't just say "OH, YEAH, YOU'RE THE ASSHEAD!" I beam and nod.
"Well, I have to go. See ya!" He walks toward the exit we exit through.
"Not bye! We're going the same way! Unofficial stalkers!" I wave with my armful of shoe and violin.
"Uhh...I can just go this way!" He walks toward the other exit.
"We can too!" Me and AJ say, while Kat laughs.
"Ok, sure, um, k, bye, hai! =D"

The end. Bai bai

Down on the Farm, Where the Sky is Always Blue, Where We Never Kill the Pigs, And The Cows Never Poo...MY NEW HOME, FARMVILLE!

Ahblah. I actually never liked FarmVille. But the song is great. The Unofficial FarmVille song. Yay.

I haven't posted in such a long time. But I just ate myself sick today...ahurbg.

*eats another Twix* My stomach is dying.


Anyway. I went to Midsummer Night's Dream yesterday, the BRAVO edition. It was epic, but the script was in actual Old English/Shakespearian, so I could only understand bits and pieces.
I very clearly understood "AND I GAVE HIM THE HEAD OF AN ASS!" Everyone laughed, but the 50 year old guy two rows behind me started laughing so hard that you could barely hear the actors. Seriously.

I ate a pack of Peanut M&Ms there, a bunch of which were given away. Same with meh Skittles.

I swear if I eat any more, I'll pop. *eats lollipop*

I can't think of anymore stuff to barf up then spread over my keyboard, to put into words. Wasn't that poetic?

All You're Ever Gonna Be Is Mean (Sorry)

I. Cannot. Get. Glogger. To. Work. ARGTHSGTHGSHGTYUSTFREIYLGTFSEUILQTAI9B.

I'm in a comfy chair, typing on a wonderfully wonderful keyboard. Kat is right next to me, trying to top her 700 views.

I had sushi yesterday...Something called a tempura roll. It was absoulutely delicious, and it tasted like...corn dog. I love it.

I also found out that deep fried tofu tastes quite a bit like sweet cold stuff. Mm.

I have nothing else to write. I'm sorry.

Some Sex Related Talk Here...Don't Click Please x3

So yeah.

I was just thinking...why do we need to 'learn' about that 'stuff' in school? We do not need to know how many cells males have versus females. When we are having a job interview, we will not be asked how many eggs it takes to make quintuplets.
All the children have to grasp is: To get knocked up, insert Tab A into Slot B.

I would normally follow this through with a bunch of puberty related puns, but not now. The show must go on.

SPEAKING OF PUBERTY (ha, fell for it), we were divided for lunch today, boys on one side, girls on the other. The 'assistant principal' held this talk.

Side note: Having three assistant principals tells kids that we are difficult now, so we need four principals to keep things from going too chaotic. Anyway.

She goes on and on about a 'Girl Group' secret from all the males on the planet. Then, cue the male, a guy walks in, just as the words 'No guy should know about this.' leaves her lips. He backs out of the door sideways and takes off running, screaming as he goes.

We were given a survey and a pencil, which I immediately snatched. The teachers told us to keep it annyoumous. My pleasure. I can write anything I want.
Here are my and a few other people's answers.

What do you struggle with? Staying serious on surveys and quizzes, and paying attention to topics such as this.

What do you have questions/want to know more about? How to become/seduce a vampire, how to fit in that dryer, how to become suicidal, how to drink a goose.

I am interested in __________(Sport, hobby, profession). Boy Scouts, Twilight, Facebook, Bustin Jeeber, eating ducks, etc.

Any questions/comments/etc.? Please don't kill me for being honest/awesome. Thanks. :)

Right then, a lady rather rudely ripped the survey and pencil out of my hands. Oh well. My voice has been heard.

Another quick thing before I go to bed...A story.


I was walking home after school, kicking up leaves quietly (yeah, it's fall here), stalking the 8th grader and 6th grader boys that I didn't know in front of me.
I was nearly at my house, and I was walking a lot faster than them, so I caught up.
8th grade dude heard me walking, and promptly grabbed 6th grade dude by the backpack and full-force yanked him out of my way, onto the lawn, about 4 feet away.

I gave them a weird look and started up the driveway, minding my own business.
I hear a voice behind me, the 6th grade dude. He's talking to his buddy. 'Dude! You just missed your chance!'
I laugh and turn around, and the two of them are staring at me. They both say 'Hi.' at the same time, then 8th grade dude pushes 6th grade dude's backpack, and off they fly, toward their supposed houses.

Huh.

That's it. I gotta go shower and sleep already...Short day tommorrow and the day after! <3

Oh, and I had Chipotle's today. Burrito. Delicious. Don't tell anyone. ♥

So...I Understand Kosher

From the tiny bit of Wikipedia I read, 'kosher' doesn't refer to Jewish people caring about the environment, going "Oh...we shouldn't eat anything with a face...". Nope, apperently how it works is they are extremely picky in what they eat, and that anything that isn't fit to their liking is 'filthy.' Ok.

No, I love Jewish people, but this just makes no sense. Thankyouverymuch.

I went to see the Lion King (Broadway!) on Sunday, which is where the name change came from. It was really great, and beautiful, and stuff.
But I have to give you the great bits.

It's important to know that I was sitting on the very right, on the balcony, in the very front. There was a mini balcony/stage built about 5 feet away from me, which was where the drummer guy had his drums.

So the play starts in on the magical song 'The Circle Of Life'.
All is great, but since that mini balcony is still, practically, stage, an actor can go up there.
Guess who came up there?
A slightly fat, slightly sweaty man, wearing nothing but an 'intermediate loincloth' (a piece of fake leather around his manly parts). He has a large stick which he is beating to the ground to 'keep rhythm.' His mask was a mountain goat, but its horns were ridicously huge, and the mouth was slightly open, revealing the sharp and shiny front teeth. It must've been great to have to drum next to him.

Another thing was when Simba and Mufasa are talking, Mufasa was discussing that 'Anything that the light touches is ours.' Simba here has to point into the crowd and say 'What about that shabby place over there?'
And yes, he pointed straight at me. Huh.

The grown-up Simba kept dancing on the (my) right of the stage, usually staring in my direction. I started to stick my toungue out at him, and he nearly cracked up on stage. Life.

So that was it for the exciting day.

People keep annoying me about 'If you don't blog, then you don't get viewers!' 'You don't blog!' 'VIEW MY MOTHER- BLOG!' ...Ok. I might. But then I might not.

Signing off.

OH, one more thing. I convinced some people that I have a 19-year-old boyfriend who lives in England called Charlie. ♥

You Make Me Crazier, Crazier.

Whenever I hear that song, I think of Taylor being lifted up at the waist and getting spun around, laughing in the rain, wearing a blue dress and no shoes, in the middle of a field. Ah.

I have a ton of weird stories, like how I'm one of the only people who can actually advertise math without it getting ripped apart.

I started reading 'Catching Fire'! Yes! I can read anything that Suzanne Collins writes. She's amazing.

I also can proudly now say that I own a flying pig! He's small, but he's glass and has fragile little wings and a huge body. So in other words, he looks like me.

I don't know what to talk about anymore. I got featured on another website, but I don't know how. Apprently, it led some other people here.

Hey you. If you're reading this, and just saying 'I'll get over with the post soon, and then I'll click next blog', then thanks. You're close to the end, I promise.

I'm also reading manga, one about a karate kid type thing (Ranma 1/2) and a messed-up love story type thing (Hot Gimmick).

My room was recently cleaned by my mom, so I have no idea where ANYTHING is. It's like dropping a bomb on the space and saying 'At least you won't have too much stuff to worry about.'

Math is getting harder. The problem is, I'm not smart. Not a prodigy. I just learn things faster...if I actually want to. I need a good reason. 'It's your education.' is not a good reason.

Why are my parents, or more specfically, my dad, being so...manner obsessed? He burps and farts and sleeps in his underwear in front of the TV. Why should I keep my mouth shut if he doesn't?
And people wonder why I like animals better.

Tommorrow is Scratch Saturday, when I make food from scratch. I also am a lot more itchy on these days.

I wonder how long this post actually is by now. Hmm.

If you're still reading, I truly love you. Not that way. Though it's possible.

I guess that's really all. It's the end! :D

Black Suits Me. I Suit You. Then he kissed me. I'm not sure I like black anymore.

AH-MAZING! NEW POST! LOOKIE HERE!

Now that I have your attention.

Yeah, I'm busy.

There are guys I chase, and guys who chase me, and guys who just high-five me in the hall and tell me that I'm getting motivated. There are is a guy I'd ask to the Halloween Dance, aka the Monster Mash Bash.

And then there are girls, my gal-pals, my...Fab Five. Busy yes. Bored no.

The quote up yonder is from a book, called I heart you, You haunt me. Yes, I admit that it made me cry. Quite a lot. I guess I somehow understood the concept of 'dead boyfriend'.

This blog's views dropped, of course, since there were no posts. Obviously. But here's a fail one to make up for it.

I got this from another friend, but if you're someone I don't know, and you comment, then you get a post written about you, my first impression, etc.

That's pretty much all. Still love all you guys that click on my blogs. Yeah. <3